365 days project 2. Day 43. Focus

   Every day has the potential to anger you and to bring you down. It might take you by surprise and you might end up wallowing in that feeling for the longest time. That's when you'll miss the small details that could make your day more beautiful, things like drawings made by kids stuck on your bus's windows.  

   You're powerful so get out of your anger, disappointment, stress or worry. Ask yourself why you are feeling all those emotions. The answer is not in the world surrounding you but deep inside yourself. What are you thinking about? What needs have you got that don't get enough attention? What's wrong? If you ask yourself all these questions you will see the light at the end of the tunnel and you'll be able to get out of the dark sooner :)

   Focus on what makes you smile. Forgive, forget and move on! Life is wonderful! Just look around! :D

365 project 2: Day 8. Don't worry, be happy, feel good

"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?" 

Matthew 6:25-27

   We worry every day. about small stuff and big stuff. Our brain is wired like that. Some worry more than others, but we all go through this. And we run from point A to point B and then C and D and E and F for a whole day. Did you ever count how many places you visit a day? On Mondays I visit around 5. 

   We go on and on and we want to meet expectations and be the best in what we do because that's how we were raised but on our wanders from point A to point B we should also look around and observe the world around us. This is how we notice tiny, little day changing events like a crow eating a pastry from the ground. It picked it up and it took it on a wire to eat it undisturbed. How amazingly smart these birds are and thus they survive and live on happily. While I was observing this, I remembered the Bible quote above and it just hit me: even if I might be 3 minutes late, walking is better than running and people won't think I am the worst person ever if I am not there on the dot. 

   I have "wake up moments" like these when I realize I should take it slow. Yeah, organize it all, but slow down and breathe and do what i love most: look around, notice life blooming, birds eating and then singing happily and know that whatever comes, everything will be fine. Such a small moment made my day :)

The twisted labyrinth

   Dear diary,

   My life is a twisted labyrinth. I'll never understand myself completely and it's been a while since we're hanging together. You'd say ups and downs are natural but I don't know if at this rate. 

   After getting on Worry Lane I turned left and fell in a dark pit. It feels lonely down here. I recognize this weird place and I remember managing to get out of it. I just don't feel strong enough to get out just yet. It's that place where you fall every time you remember you're a healer and you give yourself completely to others every day but you receive just a little back. You feel emotionally drained. Unloved. And burdens coming all over you. Then you wake up and feel like you're all alone. So you try to shut it off and stop giving so much but you can't. You just can't be something else than what you were born to be. So you go on being your true self. Because that's what you know best. You close your eyes, shed a tear or two and keep on giving knowing that one day the sun will shine again. 

   Dear diary, I'm looking forward to seeing the sun. Maybe this way I'll climb on a ray and get out of this pit. Who knows what's gonna be next? Hopefully a cheerful street.

All by myself,

D.

Day 353. It's funny

   It's funny how we can place our trust more easily in the hands of others rather than in our own hands. I guess it's easier to accept others than accept ourselves. Because we know ourselves better than anyone and we can see our flaws when the others can't. I guess they are the ones that stop us from embracing and loving ourselves the way the others love us. 

   It's funny how we can't believe it when people tell us we're beautiful or amazing. Maybe because we truly believe others are better. Why do we want to be perfect? Is it because of the society we live in? Because of the competition that is instilled in us since kindergarten?

   It's funny how we worry so easily and we over analyse every little reaction of a person we want to be accepted by. And it's even funnier that, without acknowledging it, that person feels the same about a different person he/she wants to be accepted by. It's a never ending circle of confusion and worry. 

   It's funny how often we say "I don't know what to do" when the answer lays right within us. Why would we rather ask people for solutions to our problems when all we have to do is close our eyes and listen? 

   It's funny how the social networks teach us to show off who we want to be rather than who we are. And so we post photos, we check in and we write statuses that show people how perfect we are and how awesome our life is when we're only doing it because we long for validation and appreciation and then we break so easily if they don't show the interest we're expecting.

   It's funny how we're all so messed up in our own way. It's sad that we don't accept ourselves for who we truly are and that we always try to be More in order to be liked when all we have to do is find the people who are just as messed up as we are:) But no, we want to be liked by everybody. Weird brain:) That's never gonna happen and at some point we gotta accept that. 

   So yeah, you're weird and you worry too much and you wanna be awesome but just stop for a sec and realize that you are perfect just the way you are right now. You just have to love yourself too:) The important people already do:)

Day 331. Fearless

   It's funny how we're built up to be the strongest and the weakest version of ourselves all in the same person. It all depends on how we interpret things, our past experiences and if others seem weaker than us. Then we embrace the strong version of ourselves and we want to lift that person up. And somehow the next day we will be the weak one needing to be lifted up too. Interesting... 

   Everything starts and ends with the brain:) As much as you'd like to think that events around you influence what you feel, it's never like that. And one of the reasons that brings up the worst in us is thinking about the future and the fact that we can't control it. Then panicking happens. I'm asking you though:

   Funny how that comes from the person who usually worries about stuff. See? Today I'm the strong one. For two of my best friends needed to be lifted up. We do worry because we take into consideration the possibility that it won't be ok. And then we ask ourselves: "What am I going to do then? What if I lose everything and I will be alone? How am I going to cope with that?" But in those fearful times we forget to remember that:

   Yes, you might lose your friends but then you have your family. You might lose your family but then you have your friends. And if you lose your boyfriend/girlfriend, there's always best friends and they never go away:) That's why they're best friends. And even IF you lose everything, believe me, you WILL find the power to go on and everything will be ok. Just fight for what you want and never give up. Everything will be ok in the end. If it's not ok, it's not the end:) Simple as that.

Day 324. The rough change

   From time to time we face our three fears: the fear of our haunting past, the fear of our uncertain present and the fear of our lonely and unfulfilled future. 

     The meeting is always rough and it hurts like hell but at some point we must look them in the eye and start chatting like old buddies for they are the ones that stop us from moving on with a smile on our face knowing that everything will be ok. 

   Sure, we hate the mistakes we've made in the past, but they made us better. We have no idea if our present friends are the real ones we'll have our whole life but sometimes we gotta let them go and see if they come back. We can't predict the future on the long term. We don't even know what tomorrow brings, but we gotta remember "today is the tomorrow we worried about yesterday" and that we figured it out after all.

   So, let's accept our past mistakes cos we didn't know better, let some  of our friends go and see if they come back and stop worrying about tomorrow. Everything WILL be ok, no matter how many friends, money or things we will have. It's the inner peace we need. So we gotta stop and make a change of thought.