365 project 2: Day 8. Don't worry, be happy, feel good

"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?" 

Matthew 6:25-27

   We worry every day. about small stuff and big stuff. Our brain is wired like that. Some worry more than others, but we all go through this. And we run from point A to point B and then C and D and E and F for a whole day. Did you ever count how many places you visit a day? On Mondays I visit around 5. 

   We go on and on and we want to meet expectations and be the best in what we do because that's how we were raised but on our wanders from point A to point B we should also look around and observe the world around us. This is how we notice tiny, little day changing events like a crow eating a pastry from the ground. It picked it up and it took it on a wire to eat it undisturbed. How amazingly smart these birds are and thus they survive and live on happily. While I was observing this, I remembered the Bible quote above and it just hit me: even if I might be 3 minutes late, walking is better than running and people won't think I am the worst person ever if I am not there on the dot. 

   I have "wake up moments" like these when I realize I should take it slow. Yeah, organize it all, but slow down and breathe and do what i love most: look around, notice life blooming, birds eating and then singing happily and know that whatever comes, everything will be fine. Such a small moment made my day :)

Day 115. I choose to believe

    I meant to write something about the state of complete peace I get whenever I step into a church but during the day I was approached in an unthoughtful manner about my beliefs (and "The nativity story" movie) so I'm writing about my beliefs instead. 

   In this rushing world where the most important thing is having money and enjoying yourself, few are those who still seek God, no matter His appearance. I know we can find plenty of reasons not to believe, be it because we can't see Him, because the facts the Bible describes happened too long ago and they were written by simple people who could have lied or because the priests have hidden some of what was written in order to control us and that some of them are to be ashamed of instead of being a role model for the society they work for. Honestly, I don't care if some of the history written in the Bible is distorted or lacks information. It's enough for me. I choose to believe because it makes me a better person. It makes me feel at peace with myself and solve problems easier. It makes me be confident and give sense to everything that happens to me. I don't have to see God in person to believe He exists. I can feel Him. I choose to believe in Him because of His son and the role model He is for me. 

   I know there are sooo many debatable things regarding christianity but I choose to have my own religion, my own path and believe. I don't go to church every Sunday, I'm not the best human being but I strive. I want to be better. I want to help the others. And today, the priest said that striving helps. So I choose to believe and I want to be accepted for who I am. I want to be shown thoughtfulness instead of being pointed and laughed at. I'm a human being and I do have feelings.