Think happy thoughts

Dear diary,

   I'm a perfectionist. So I worry a lot. Sometimes I think that maybe things won't go as planned and I envision a posible bad outcome believing that this way I would be prepared for whatever comes. "Always be prepared for the bad things", my dad said. But in all my worry and irrational thinking I forget how important and life changing happy thoughts are. How just by envisioning a positive outcome, I already bring it closer. 

   I won't lie, it's difficult to try to think positive no matter what especially when you've been brought up a certain way. But I know kids do it all the time. If they can wake up every morning with a smile on their face forgetting about yesterday, why can't we? What I love about kids the most is how, because of their still developing brain, they can't think too far ahead. And boy, does that help. They focus on here and now and that's all they know. They do learn from their mistakes, but they can't plan for the long term future. So unless they really miss their mommy or some friend doesn't want to play with them, they don't worry. How amazing that is! 

   Because of the society we live in and because of all the accumulated negative emotional baggage we always seem to carry with us we step forward with fear and we lose touch with the inner child and the positive thoughts we can have. But the good thing is that we can teach our brain to focus on different things than it's used to. We, unlike kids, can solve problems so much easier and sometimes just by re-directing our thoughts. Isn't that amazing?

   So today I'm thinking happy thoughts even if the weather outside is kind of sad. I know I can bring the sun on the cloudy sky by drawing it in my mind. Because people are THAT powerful :)

Happy,

D.

Dreamers

   Dear diary,

      Will we ever learn? Or will we keep making the same mistakes over and over again? 

   Will we ever choose the important over the urgent? The need over the want? Tomorrow over now? Will we choose right? 

   I'm back to square one because I chose now over tomorrow (again). And things might get out of control. But I'm telling myself they don't have to go exactly how I planned them. That I can always change, twist and bend to make it okay in the end and that my friends and family can help when everything else fails. Yep. I should remember that. I donno why they keep teaching us to succeed by ourselves. We're never alone, like they say. Not when we're born, nor when we die. 

   In the end, I guess we're dreamers who enjoy breaking the rules. Ones who know tomorrow might never come. Isn't life short anyhow? So why not take advantage of it while we still can? Why not make mistakes and challenge ourselves to fix them afterwards?:) It can be a useful process. 

With love,

The one who thinks she has everything under control 

and is always mistaken

P.S. I decided to stop making a schedule about when to write. I'll try to make it once a week, but nothing's final. I want my memories to be powerful, not just any random thing that happens. So, I guess you understand.

Day 309. Exceeding expectations

   Many times we leave home thinking that we know what lies ahead of us that day. We plan it so we expect it to go according to the plan. But how wrong we are for thinking like that! Life is all about surprises that exceed our expectations, roads that we didn't take into consideration, something different than expected and yet more beautiful and amazing than what we had planned:)

   I felt all those today. My boyfriend and I went for a long walk and a photo shoot on a hill near our city. As usual, I had thought about where I want to go and the kind of photos I want to take. But I was more than surprised when life read my thoughts and somehow made us face a  huge wheat field. A dream that I didn't think of accomplishing today:) I loved every bit of it even if at first I was upset to be far away from the goal I set at home. A blessing in disguise. That's what this was. Such a beautiful one:) 

   So, today I learned that life does exceed our expectations and all we gotta do is be open minded to change. Set goals, alright, but be prepared to have the ride of your life until you get where we want. At least I know that's how today felt:)

Day 196. Where to?

   When we're little we think about the toys we want to play with, our friends from the kindergarten or the cartoons we're going to watch when we get home. When we grow up we start thinking about our future. At first, it's the immediate future: the high school or university we want to attend, the friends we want to have and that ideal relationship that we want to last forever. When we're working we inevitably think about the distant future: a family, a place of our own, a kid. 

   It's interesting how things evolve over time. And it's a bit scary when you have to plan your whole life ahead and know you have to take the best decisions, choose the best option when everything seems so insecure. But that's why we have the internet and friends for. To ask them what they think and start from there. And then hope for the best and learn to be flexible. Change plans whenever they seem not to work anymore. And never lose hope. Believe everything is going to be ok, no matter how twisted the labyrinth might be. 

   And in the end everything comes true. And we'll see "where to?" was just a question that made us start a whole new chapter in our life: the best one:) 

Day 9. I do!

   I don't know about you but I love love love weddings!:) They make me all warm and fuzzy inside and I can't but enjoy watching photos taken by famous wedding photographers or attend weddings myself:) 
   On Saturday I went to one of my best friend's wedding, a wedding that was expected and planned with a lot of care and joy. The bride, my friend, was more radiant than ever and the wedding itself was so beautiful, classy and elegant. No glam, no kitch, no over the top. Everything was simple yet so vibrant and suited to the couple's personality. They are perfect together and for sure this wedding was an event I'll never forget. 

   My friend's married now and her beautiful wedding reminded me how important it is to love and be loved and the joy that comes with the feeling... the feeling you belong to someone and that someone belongs to you.