Perfectly imperfect

Dear diary,

   Everything that happened around me lately helped me realize how imperfect we all are, how afraid we are to not meet expectations, worried about an uncertain grown up future, angry knowing we don't own everything we want, sad thinking everybody judges us. We're truly our own biggest enemies. We are the ones who stop ourselves from reaching daily happiness by allowing all the negative emotions make room in our mind. We're living in a constant fear, we love and grow dependent of the ones we love, forgetting that we have to love ourselves first in order to have a basic happy life. 

   Today I didn't wear any makeup while going to work and I still smiled. I inhaled the fresh air, watched the birds chirping, the sun rays reaching me through fresh green trees, colorful people walking to work and I smiled again saying "You know what? I'm beautiful just the way I am. And today I love myself." It was such an important start of a good day. I focused on watching happy people pass me by, I imagined their happy little lives and I told myself again the mantra of a wise friend I adopted last night: "I'm not happy all the day, but I'm happy every day." And so I shall. I will accept that I am perfect in my imperfection and I will allow myself to have good days and bad days, cooking experiments gone wild and tears now and then. Because it's all natural. But I will focus on the negative side less and less... and when the world seems too hard to bear, I'll call a friend and bear it together. Cos two is always better than one.

Sunny and proud,

D.

Day 311. Listen up

   People are social beings and they communicate through speech and body language. We all know that. The bug is that many times we don't know HOW to share our ideas and we end up messing up our relationships with our friends and family because we want them to understand us but we fail to remember that we have to understand them too. How many times did that happen to you?

   The key to few conflicts is being assertive. And that involves telling people what you feel without hurting them in any way. How to do that? Describe the behavior that bothers you, say how you feel and mention the effect of that behavior on you. Don't just put it on them. Don't judge or criticize them. Try to understand them too and start listening more. Listen to their needs and tell them your needs in an assertive way. Work together on keeping the good vibe:) 

   Be the one to start behaving differently and then notice the change that occurs around you. Stay assertive. And don't forget: 

Day 152. The lessons of a father

   Work's all right and my days pass looking very similar one to another but the things, people or messages I meet every day make my days special. 

   Today I read a girl's blog post about how she was brought up and the teachings her dad gave her along the childhood years. I was particularly impressed by the wisdom of that father who, of all things, taught his daughter the importance of being kind to the others, treat them the best and not judge people by their appearance but by their "inside". He also said that things have a life of their own and they are meant to break at some point so we shouldn't weep for the broken but accept the fact and replace them with new ones and that, in the end, people are more valuable than things. I wish I will be just as wise when I will be a mother:)

Take a look at the exact words of this amazing father:

"Porcelain dishes aren't important, people are. So, you should serve breakfast, lunch or dinner in porcelain dishes to anybody who enters your home no matter his social class or ethnicity." 

"Never take the last piece of cake from a plate. Maybe somebody didn't have the chance to take any or maybe someone else needs it more than you do." 

 "When you have two apples, give away the biggest and most beautiful of the two. And if other time you receive the small apple, don't complain. Don't have high expectations and don't be greedy."

"Give thanks for every bit of food you receive from somebody. The person who cooked that food has given you a part of her life."

"Don't judge people for their ethnicity for they are not guilty they were born this way. Don't reject people, even if the others reject them. Try to know a person first before saying that he's ugly, stupid or bad."

"Things have their own life. They all have to be replaced at some point."

"Speak to people like you'd be speaking to yourself."

"Gifts aren't meant to be an exchange. You don't have to give back the exact value of the gift you have received."

"You shouldn't choose people to be your friends by their clothes. You should choose them with your eyes closed so you couldn't see their beauty or the things they possess. Don't be ashamed to have a friend who's different." 

 You can find the whole post in Romanian, here: http://www.irinab.com/p/copilarii.html 

   Read it!:) It will change your life and make you appreciate your parents more... And we all need that:)

Day 72.Big Brother

   Even if we don't think about it very often or even if we don't like to admit it, we're always under careful supervision. Our brain helps us make our first impression about someone in a matter of seconds so it's enough to simply pass by someone on the street. You're immediately framed and put in a category. And then, there are people around you who know you from different places. And they're watching you. Your every move. They want to be like you or they want to be different. 

   We're never alone. The others are watching and many of them are also judging.

   Never judge someone by their appearance. Learn to know their soul first and then decide if you want to be around or not:) Prepare to be surprised!:)