Sunday, February 17, 2013

Day 164. Smile, tomorrow will be worse!

get me anywhere

   And yet Murphy is right again. I wish I'd say "I will get better! Everything will be fine", but this time I really can't:( 
   No matter how close I was to 100% healing, my file stopped at 98% again... these past couple of nights I felt an awful stabbing pain in the left side of my chest... aaaand the fever is back. My parents even called in the ambulance (yay, there's a first for everything). The doctor said I should stay at home another week and continue the treatment. 
   WHEN will I get back to work?:( All I want is to be fit as a fiddle again, that bundle of joy everybody knows, but my body doesn't seem to be on the same page with me so my physical illness is turning into a psychological breakdown too. I feel totally overwhelmed by the situation and don't know where to turn to. I'm in that state that I'm afraid to breathe or sit on my back that I would feel pain so it's kinda like feeling trapped in a tiny box with nowhere to go. And I hate this tiny box! Someone please get me out of here!!!! 
   ... yeah, sometimes even psychologists break down. 


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